Painful Intercourse
Many women experience painful intercourse as long as 6 months after having a vaginal birth. In some cases the sex is painful because there is pressure to perform, or an expectation that pain will be felt.
If you are feeling pressured then it may help to speak to your partner about how you feel and what you need so that you can feel comfortable and relaxed enough to have sex.
If you have physically healed and are still experiencing pain this is known as dysparunia. A general definition of dysparunia is when you experience pain associated with sex after the initial cause of pain has healed. Doing things which will help you relax and feel confident about sex may help with this.
There are other ways that you can satisfy your partner sexually and there are lots of ways that he can pleasure you without having to have sex if you don't feel comfortable. You may like to take a bath together, give each other a massage or just spend some romantic time together. Think of it like dating or courting all over again.
Building your confidence in this way and taking the pressure off will help to make you more comfortable with the idea of having sex. When you do decide it's time to try again, it will help if your partner is very gentle and slow.
If a particular area of your vagina is painful you can try different positions and different degrees of penetration. Many women prefer positions that give them control so that they can act according to how they feel.
Many women find that low estrogen levels can cause vaginal dryness right up until their first period. In this case you can try using a lubricant gel or prescribed oestrogen creams. The small amounts of oestrogen will pass through your breast milk at about the same rate that passes through during ovulation, so it should be fine and shouldn't affect your milk supply.
If you are still experiencing painful intercourse months after your baby is born please see your doctor. Try not to just wait and wait for it to get better. I know seeing a doctor about these things is not something pleasant but one discussion or check up can be enough to get you healed and well again.
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